No Place Like Home

As if it wasn't before, the pressure is on. Time is getting short, to-do lists seem to be getting longer, and months of anticipation are turning into reality.

The 2012 General Conference of The United Methodist Church begins in only two weeks. Since I work MFSA, a caucusing organization within the church, it seems that 100% of my life right now revolves around this huge event that happens every 4 years. In fact, it is such a big deal for our organization that our entire staff have already taken one trip down together to visit the area and conference center, and are going to be on the ground and organizing a FULL WEEK before the conference even starts. Which means my D-Day for departure for this year's location (it rotates) in Tampa, Florida is only 8 days. AHH!

Realizing today that this is my last full week in the office, I was ancy, stressed, and as a result quite snarky all day with my fellow staff. Fortunately, so were they and we are all close so all was well and we laughed about it together. But all in all, though nothing specifically went wrong today, this tension and growing pressure really just made today "one of those days."

Which brings me to now. Here. As I sit writing this in the comfort of my home, snuggled up under a blanket sitting on my bed with my computer on my lap.

Something about the growing pressure of this work significantly diminishes as I sit in my safe space to do it.

No, I cannot get everything I need done on this computer. No, I do not have my colleagues next to me to bounce ideas off of before I hit "send" on emails. There are lots of things that make working at work a whole lot better and easier. But tonight, I'm grateful to get lots done, and grateful not to be there.

Because, in the words of Dorothy, there really is "no place like home."

It is good to realize this as I prepare to leave next week for a month-long journey in Florida (I will be there for 18 days for work then take a week of leave with friends in Orlando). It is good to spend time at home, safe and comfortable and in the quiet in my "safe space." It is good to make time for reflection and prayer in the midst of the craziness around me.

And it is good to have this reminder as I prepare for all that is to come. I am excited about it and would have it no other way than for me to be there for the duration, but I have no illusions about it being less than strenuous, difficult, and trying physically, emotionally and spiritually.

So today, I celebrate this opportunity to take in solitude and click my heels. I may even work from home for a day this week. Because really, truly: there is no place like home.

Mozying around

Waiting for the train from a cool shaded spot. It's good to be back in Cape Town! I've missed its lovely people, sunshine, and beautiful bright blue skies! It doesn't hurt that I'm on a properly lazy holiday, either ;)

Going Home

I travel a lot for work, and the next 6 months will be no exception. I do not anticipate being home for more than 2 consecutive weeks (even 2 weeks is unusual!) at any given time between now and when I pack up to move back to the Dakotas in August. This is a blessing and a curse: I get to meet a lot of people and see a lot of friends along the road: and I love flying, traveling, and visiting new places.

As much as I love seeing new places, though, there's nothing like visiting an old place I know and love

While in Tampa for a conference two weeks ago, I overheard the conversation of a couple other staff members. I didn't hear much, but the one word that stuck out to me was an important one: Harare. I immediately chimed in to a conversation that was not my own, "I want to go to Harare!" I was kidding, of course, and they smiled at me and carried on their conversation as I carried on with whatever else I was doing.

2 minutes later my boss comes over and says to me, "so: do you really want to go to Harare?"

Long story short: it has been decided that my own travel and life experiences would be a great asset to the trip being planned to Harare. Fortunately, our Board of Directors also agreed, and so in 2 days, I leave for Harare, Zimbabwe.

After a few more days in Mutare, Zimbabwe and a visit I've always wanted to make to Africa University, we will board our flights home. Only: our flights back to the US stop over in Johannesburg, and I can't say no to that kind of temptation. As excited as I am for the opportunity to go to Zimbabwe, I am even more excited about my upcoming vacation in South Africa!!

I'll be spending only one night in Johannesburg and 9 days in Cape Town. Which means it will feel like a very quick trip, but I'll take an unexpected quick trip any day compared to the alternative of no trip at all!!

A photo of Table Mountain I took
on a camping trip in January 2010

This unexpected adventure has brought a boost to my spirit I did not otherwise realize I needed. I could not be happier than to be not just going on vacation, but returning "home."I hope to do a whole lot of nothing: to cook and laugh and watch movies with my family. To meet the new additions to family (wink, nudge Lisa!). To have tea at Kirstenbosch Gardens or go camping. To stroll on the beach and eat the best fish in the world at Kalky's. Proably have a braai, too, since a South African summer isn't complete without it. These are very important tasks...

I hope to update here a time or two while I'm on my journey... but don't get hopes up too much: visits home tend to be very busy with all the socializing and such... so I'm just not sure I'll be able to manage it all. Oh, the conundrum... :)

A Day to Remember

I've had a lot of memorable days in my life. Yesterday was definitely one of those days when even in the midst of it, I kept saying, "I can't believe this is happening! What a great day!"

Why was it a great day?

First, its a great weekend: my friend Lyzz (from the '09 Ride:Well Tour) is here to visit! She arrived on Thursday morning and didn't leave until tonight (Monday). That being said: yesterday was an especially stellar day.

The morning started by meeting my friend Anna for a coffee (straight espresso for me!). Then we were off to the occasion of the morning: The White House garden party. Evidently, the White House opens up its garden twice a year (fall and spring) to "special guests." By invitation only, the "general public" are invited into the White House grounds to see the gardens. My friend Anna is a senior staff person for a Senator, and through work she obtained tickets to this party and kindly invited me along - also saving a ticket for my weekend visitor. :)


Entering the White House grounds was surreal. As crowds gathered on the sidewalk two fences and a street away from the beginning of the grounds, we passed through security guards by simply showing them a slip of paper and letting them look in our bags. The next thing we knew, we were looking at trees on the grounds planted by presidents past. As we stood next to the East Wing admiring Jacqueline Kennedy Garden we saw a big fluffly black dog appear: sure enough! It was Beau - the first dog!

We took photos posed feet from the main door. We admired the Rose Garden as we wondered if Obama was sitting in his Oval Office only feet away from us. We decided such a question was answered when security suddenly seemed to double and one of Obama's senior staff persons walked past. :)

The grounds were beautiful and I am greatly appreciative of such an opportunity for a tour. The gardens, the flowers, the trees, the vegetable garden, the naval band playing, the incredibly friendly staff and volunteers - all of it - was great. A huge thank you to is in order to all the volunteers who put the event on: and of course to Anna for thinking of me as a worthy guest!

Leaving we kind of thought to ourselves: now what? How does one spend a day when we've already been on the White House grounds?

Back to Plan A, we decided. Originally, Lyzz came this weekend so we could go to the official dedication of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Junior Memorial. The first memorial in DC to an individual who was not a president (and not white), this is an event that has been much anticipated since its original opening in August - when this event was canceled due to Hurricane Irene. We were late, but hoped it would be ongoing and decided to take our chances as we began the 2 mile walk to the memorial.

Fortunately, we arrived to discover it had not ended. As we drew near, Lyzz wondered aloud, "is that James Taylor? He can't possibly be playing live, could he?" She excitedly ran ahead and I caught up to her in time to discover: Yes! James Taylor.

Seriously: James Taylor? Does it get better than this? As we soaked in another song he announced it would be his last and we sighed as we realized we missed most of the set. Surely the event was over: it was nearly 2pm.

Oh, were we mistaken. On and on we went: we also saw short performances by Stevie Wonder, Sheryl Crow and others. It ended in an encore of countless artists singing "Love Train" together. Only one word can describe this experience of singing, dancing, and celebrating together in a huge but not congested crowd: AMAZING

After a stroll through my favorite memorial (Theodore Roosevelt!) and then to see the new MLK Memorial, we eventually walked our way back through part of the national mall. We landed in a pub for dinner before finally making our way home where we had ice cream for dinner as we crashed lazily on the couch watching a movie.

Pretty close to a perfect day, if I might say so myself. Or at the very least, a memorable one!

Transitioning

Well... The time has come. I've been anticipating it with great hesitation for a while now, but I suppose there is nothing I could do to really be prepared for it. In the moments I think I'm ready, in the moments I think I know what to expect, its those moments that are followed by the crash of reality that I could never really be either of these things.

So here I sit. Waiting with sadness and grief of what I leave behind. Focusing on the joy (and positive growth from the sorrows) of all that has passed and become a part of me over the past 18 months. And reveling in excitement and anticipation for all that lies ahead.

Because today, my heart is full of grief as I have bid many people I love farewell.

I am nervous as I consider the questions associated with the ways I have changed from the inside out. Change I may not recognise for years to come, but which begs questions such as: how will 'home' feel different as a new person enters for the first time?

And despite all of this, I am confused and grateful for excitement as I prepare to board a plane to Ireland, where a new country and an old friend await me for a week of adventure. I am thrilled that I shall soon be reunited with family and friends I have not seen in a year and a half, not the least of whom include new additions such as my nephew Quintin.

So a cloud of emotion surrounds me today, and only one word seems to describe how they are linked:

Grateful.

To the Point

I promised photos of "people and places and sites and views that I am soaking up" in my last few weeks here. One my South African "bucket list" was to go to Cape Agulhas - the southern tip of Africa, and where the two oceans officially "meet." Here I am. 

While I'm certainly going to miss the amazing scenery I'm surrounded by, having friends to run away on weekend road trips with no real itinerary is pretty great, too.

Holiday

Growing up, we didn’t go on holidays out of town. Instead, we would spend summer weekends at the local lake, or my Mom would take us to the zoo. Trust me: that was holiday enough as that 90 minute drive (once 3+ hours because she got lost) was plenty of time for my poor mother and her 4 squabbling children.

So, with one exception of a road trip to Minneapolis with 8 of us piled in a van, I didn’t grow up going on family holidays.

Now: fast forward to my present life. I live with a family that has taken me in as one of their own. As Pete was moving to Pietermaritzburg, a road trip was in order to take a few things there, including his motor bike and the truck. So: roof tents in order, back packed with amazing precision by Jess, and into the bakkie 5 of us went, with poor Pete struggling to keep awake as we slowly made our way from one side of South Africa, to the other.

It has been an adventure learning to fall into the natural rhythm of the family’s holiday “routines” - if you can call them that. Their “routine” basically includes plentiful coffee (and thus toilet) breaks and stopping off for petrol or to take photos or to see unique shops or anything else that is felt like in the morning.

As long as you understand three things, life will be grand when on holiday with the Grassows:

Visiting and drinking freshly roasted Terbodore
Coffee was definitely a highlight!

    1. Holiday begins the moment you leave the driveway.
    2. Coffee is important and should be consumed regularly.
    3. Nothing and no one moves faster than a leisurely pace.

Needless to say, I’m having a great time!

There's No Place Like Home...

For me, the most difficult part of living in another country is being away from people. To be honest, most of the time I don’t really miss my friends and family, but perhaps that is because modern technology allows me to stay in touch with them almost as well as if I only lived across the country.

Almost.

The reality is, I don’t. This makes for a few tough scenarios. One is obvious: while I am still technically just a plane ride away (as I was in Chicago), it is a very long and expensive plane ride, making it difficult for me to realistically fly back and forth. This means I have missed several events in my one year in South Africa that I would not have missed had I been anywhere in the continental United States. For example, I have a nephew who will have his first birthday in a couple of weeks, and I am yet to meet him. That simply would not have happened. I have also missed several weddings and even a family reunion to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of my grandparents: an event I may never live down (or forget) missing.

Aside from missing events such as these, there is one other thing I really miss: phone calls. For one thing, it is expensive to call here, so it just doesn’t make sense for anyone to phone me when we can speak for free over skype or I can phone the US for something like 1/10 the cost of someone phoning me from there.

So yes: we have skype. Honestly, it has rescued me from more than one of “those days” when I just really needed someone from “home” to talk to. But when those moments come, or when I remember it is a birthday and want to phone and wish you the best, or when I see something that I would like to send in a picture message (from one phone to the next), the computer and internet and skype are not always convenient. Nor available. Nor functioning with a proper connection. Or if they are, the time of the day is off just enough that while I’d like to phone you on my lunch break, something tells me you wouldn’t appreciate a 6am wake up call.

Today was one of those days for me. All is well in the camp here, but it would sure be nice to pick up a phone sometimes. But I’m sure life will go on and all will be well tomorrow. So thanks for reading my rant, and while you’re at it, I invite you to lift up a little prayer for whoever else in the world may be feeling this way at the time you’re reading this.

Change in Perspective

It has been quite some time since I have written. A lot has happened since then. Namely, I have been blessed by three weeks of hosting guests. On the 25th of April, my older sister Alicia arrived in Johannesburg, and stayed for two weeks, through the 8th of May. On the 4th of May, my friend and fellow ’09 Ride:Well Tour teammate Cody arrived, and he also stayed for two weeks, through the 17th of May. Needless to say, the past month has flown by.

Many reflections have come from this time. It was incredible and strange and difficult all at the same time to have them here. Obviously, there is a comfort from having people from “home” in a place on the other side of the world (which I now call “home”). There were also challenges. This place is different from where we are used to being together. Context, culture, people, circumstances, etc. - all of these things have shifted. It was exciting and new for my guests; they came enthusiastic to learn about and experience this new place. What I did not anticipate was how I might experience my life differently with an added lens of friends/family by my side.

Teaching someone about my life here is very different when I am not just sharing stories, but inviting them to see for themselves. Some of the sharing was difficult. It involved cultural and historical understandings of the land in which I live. Discussions about Apartheid and race and culture. Some of the sharing was lighter and more “fun” - introducing friends, colleagues, and my “family” here, sharing food and local traditions, visiting places I love. Then there were the other things, the small things that made us laugh together - the ways my accent has changed, the language I have adapted, the music we listen to, driving on the left side of the road.

Over the past month, I have been reflecting for the first time on different types of culture shock. when I think of culture shock I have always thought that I would be the one needing to move to a new place to experience it. I have realized through this experience that home comes to me, the same types of “culture shock” can apply. Not to the same extreme, of course, but in a whole new way: how do I balance my new life and changed self, with the old, expected self friends are coming to see and visit?

These are some of the issues and questions I have been mulling over. My hope is that more will come on these topics in the next few days as I seek time to write further reflections.

Everything is Double-Double!

As if I weren’t excited or surprised before, I was REALLY surprised when I got up yesterday morning and checked my email. I had a message waiting for me on Facebook from my good friend Cody. Cody and I were teammates and in the same small group on Ride:Well 09. This is the same small group I call SABR with affection, and whom I still meet with via skype at least once a month. Why let distance or the end of tour keep us from gathering? Now that I live on the other side of the world and Tyler is also considering moving overseas for missions, we find it appropriate to say, “May the sun never set on SABR!”

SABR minutes after reaching the East Coast on the '09 Ride:Well Tour. L-R Lisa, Tyler, Jen, Cody

I emailed SABR a few days ago asking when we were meeting next, so I figured this message was Cody responding with a day/time that would work for him. Was I ever wrong!  Better than a time for a skype date, Cody was emailing with dates to make sure they would work for me - he is coming to visit!!! He has talked about it since June or July of last year… but honestly, it was hard to believe it would really happen. Not because he wouldn’t want to, but because realistically it isn’t cheap, and if I got my hopes up, well, I wouldn’t want to be set up for disappointment.

No disappointment here.

The dates Cody gave me overlapped by one week with my sister’s dates - he would arrive on my birthday! So after talking to my sister to make sure she was still up for a companion for half of her time here, I quickly called Cody to confirm… unfortunately we both have jobs and are several time zones away, so I didn’t catch him. No worries, though, emails are not restricted by time zones… I hit send and went to bed, hoping for more news in the morning.

I woke this morning and was quite pleased to find an email waiting for me from Cody… its finished! The ticket is booked, and in 6 weeks’ time, my sister will be here for 2 weeks… and one week into that visit, Cody will arrive for a 2 week stay! I will have visitors for 3 solid weeks!!!

oh, sweet, sweet excitement, I dont even know how to react! And how perfect the timing! It is absolutely perfect, as these weeks fall just between my two trips to Zambia (one in April, another in May). Then Alicia and Cody will be here to entertain one another as I run Spirituality Week at the Centre - how great is that!? So they can see the centre, spend time there, I’ll probably even put them to work some, ha. They’ll also have time to meet and interact; I love it when my worlds collide! Then I’ll also have one week with each of them to hang out, catch up, etc.

The subject of Cody’s email was, “THIS IS REAL LIFE!” I can’t believe this is my life, that its really happening! I am SO excited!!! Oh, sweet, wonderful joy, this is truly incredible, and perhaps more of what I needed than I may have ever recognized!!!

A secured visitor!

Last I heard from my sister, it sounded like she wasn’t going to come. One of her best friends was going to come with her to visit next month, but he has since backed out. It sounded like she was going to do her best to come in the fall (Sept-ish) instead. In reality, this was a nightmare because of how difficult it is to schedule visitors around my hectic and changing work schedule, and a complete relief. A relief not because I didn’t want her to visit, but because this is a very busy time of year. Our training center closes in June so if she comes in April/May, I’ll already be planning my final lessons while also trying to coordinate and communicate better with the satellites. Not to mention the dates of the Zambia trip have changed several times, so no one is sure when exactly we’ll be coming or going, and I would hate to miss her!

This morning when we got home from church I checked my email - we have internet at home now! Much to my surprise, I had two emails waiting for me from my sister, Alicia. Contrary to what I thought last week (that she’s not able to come to visit next month), the message waiting said she had booked a ticket! She’s coming to visit!!!

As of today, the ticket she booked brings her to Joburg on the morning of the afternoon I should arrive back from Zambia. This means she’ll only be stranded without me a couple of hours, rather than a couple of days. Not so bad, right? I’ll just find someone to fetch her, and meet her in a few hours time.

I know my words do not express it here, partly because I am still in shock that someone is actually coming, but I am REALLY excited that my sister is coming to visit! We have oh-so-many things to plan for her visit, and only about 6 weeks to do it; and I can’t wait! We’ve made all sorts of tentative plans, and I can’t wait to see what will come. The only thing I have told her she HAS to do, is go to Cape Town. So… this means I have an “excuse” (in case I needed one) to go visit! Oh, the joy and excitement - I can’t wait!!!

Upcoming Trips - oh my!

What’s not to love about a 4- or 5-hour long staff meeting? I know I love them! ….

This is what we have many Monday mornings at SHADE. In theory if we actually had them weekly, they would be shorter, but we rarely have two in a row.

This week’s meeting was at least productive. We spent much of the time going through the year plan for the office, highlighting important dates and upcoming trips. Last week I met with Tembo and she gave me a list of dates I would be traveling, so I did not expect to be surprised during the meeting. Boy, was I wrong!

If no trips changed (HIGHLY unlikely), right now the tentative schedule has me traveling out of South Africa 8 times in the next 8 months! I am both really excited about this intense traveling schedule, and a bit intimidated. The trips are to various countries throughout Africa, including satellite visits, our annual satellite leadership training event, and a clergy training event. It is great to get to travel and be a part of leading these trips, and looking at the schedule it is easy to see that this year is going to fly by, and though its early, I’ve already begun to get sad about the idea of leaving.

My first trip will still be the aforementioned journey to Zambia - but guess what? The dates DID change again! Fortunately, if this trip were to be pushed back, they were pushed back in the kindest way possible. I am to arrive back in South Africa the same weekend as my sister was hoping to arrive for a visit, if she is still able to come. Not sure she will be, its not looking optimistic at this point. Especially if I’m traveling this much. I’d hate to give up any chance at a personal life for work, but that is in fact why I moved here (for work), so I emailed my sister and said if the dates can’t work, we’ll have to sort another time for her to come (which may not be possible). So… we’ll see. With potential traveling every month except June between April and November, and all dates subject to change, it sure makes it difficult to plan anything!

Tentative Plans

Everything in life is tentative right now. Even what time I will go to work in the morning, really. By now I’m into a routine and used to the reality of my world that is “hurry up and wait.” This means I must be ready for transport to work to fetch me by 8am: If they show up and I am not ready, no one is pleased with me. The reality is actually that they have only been on time to fetch us right at 8am once in the two months we’ve been here; its usually closer to 10. So I rise each morning, hurry to get ready, then wait, wondering whether I should get work out and be productive at home, or wait with my things packed up so as not to make the driver wait for me to pack up once he arrives. This is my morning. Every day. (except those days when not everyone goes to work so we can all fit in one trip: these days, we leave by 6am).

Really, its a parallel to my life right now, too: everything is tentative. I am hoping to have a few visitors during my stay in South Africa, the first which will hopefully be my sister next month. She is looking into tickets while I sit and wait for my work schedule to change. Now that work is in full swing and I have enough to do to work 15 hours/day, part of my work will soon also include a great deal of international travel. The first of these trips will (potentially) be to Zambia in April. Potential, of course, because these dates have already changed twice and very well may again. My hope is just that they dont end up changing to the dates my sister is planning to be here… I have already made her change dates once to avoid this, so it would be sad to have her come all the way here, only to have me out of the country (or for me to have to skip the trip, as it could go either way).

Perhaps it is selfish, but I’m praying to have my cake and eat it too! I would certainly not want to cancel a work trip to Zambia: both because I wish to go, and also because of the disruption that may cause in the office. However, it would also be great to see at least one person from home (my sister!!!) sometime during this year and a half I am away… it would be very sad to have to cancel on either of these trips! So… Here’s to hoping for the best - and that it can all work out!

A Bizarre Trend

I came across this quote on my friend Lisa’s new blog today, and I while I have heard it several times before, I think it fits incredibly well with my last post.

The bizarre trend in mountaineers is not the risk they take, but the large degree to which they value life. They are not crazy because they don't dare, they're crazy because they do. These people tend to enjoy life to the fullest, laugh the hardest, travel the most, and work the least.  ~Lisa Morgan.

While I am definitely not a mountaneer, I do resonate deeply with these words and like to think that I do my best to live in accordance with this philosophy. I think the best part might even be "work the least" because for me, it doesn't mean I become lazy or cease to have gainful employment. It just means that I have been blessed to find meaningful work that does not in fact feel like I am working most of the time.

That being said, I hope if this ever ceases to be true in my life, my good friends who have taken these journeys of life with me will not be afraid to challenge and push me into a ridiculous-sounding new adventure.

Finally an Aunt!

It is good to be home! Travels were uneventful (thankfully!) and we have all been home since Late Wednesday evening. We spent Thursday resting and re-settling into our home in Cape Town, and are working our energy back up as we look forward to getting back into the office. Believe it or not, I’ve really missed the office, our scheduled work and our incredible staff we get to spend the days with. It is good to be home, and I look forward to returning to Salt River to work on Monday!

Of utmost importance other than the details of arriving home safely is big family news I am excited to share! After more than two days of labor, my little sister Aleah has given birth to a beautiful baby boy!!! My first nephew Quintin Eugene was born on Wednesday, November 18 and was 8lbs, 4oz and 21in long! Mom and baby are still recovering but doing well, and expect to go home on Saturday.

Here he is - isn’t he beautiful!?!?

My only regret is that I am so far away, but I have been assured by Aleah and my mother both that they will cuddle and kiss him plenty for me, too! Please join with me in celebrating the birth of her first child (my mother’s first grandchild after she’s wanted grandchildren for so long!), and in praying for them as she learns all the intricacies of motherhood. (and fatherhood for Daddy Corn!)

Welcome, baby Quintin, and congrats Mommy Aleah and Daddy Corn! Love you guys!

Celebrations

I write today from our host home, Uncle Jimmy’s house in Lubumbashi. We (Rachel Hannah and I) were supposed to leave with the rest of the South Africa group yesterday, but we realized that we had not yet seen much of the Congo outside of the conference walls and our drive between the center and Uncle Jimmy’s home, so we changed our tickets and have decided to stay an extra few days: through Wednesday. We will then fly home with Joyce, Mama Tembo and Papa David.

(Our "family portrait" from the Cultural evening with Mama Tembo, Papa David, their daughter Joyce, her friend Abigail, and of course Lucy, our friend/sister/roommate for the week, and co-worker at SHADE)

The conference officially ended Friday, and while it was sad to be over, I think our bodies are also somewhat grateful. I know I have learned a valuable lesson about which Malaria pills I should not be taking, as I have had terrible reactions to the ones I have been taking, and as such have spent most of the past ten days quite sickly. I’ll spare the details, but I will say that I am grateful to have some time of much-needed rest and to a more regular eating schedule, something that certainly cannot hurt an aching and upset stomach.

Aside from that, this week really had been phenomenal. The official ending of the conference was marked with the Cultural evening/event on Friday. We had a lovely dinner and everyone dressed up in cultural attire, including us Americans. It was a great opportunity to feast, fellowship and laugh together one last time before we had to part ways with our new friends. I know I was certainly thankful for those final non-work related conversations we had the opportunity to share with new friends! Not to mention the music, the presentations and the fashion shows that ensued. There were no dull moments to be had, that much is certain!

I am struggling to come up with words to describe the evening or the close of this week. I am still processing the many events of the week, and am nothing if not grateful for being a part of it. There were lots of struggles this week, lots of joys and sorrows shared, lots of memories created and friendships began. God was present and faithful and full of surprises, but most of all, Good. We know that All the time, God is Good, and this week was no exception. Right now, I can do little but celebrate in that fact, in how well the conference went despite all the challenges faced. In such a mode of celebration and gratitude, I want to share a few pictures from our closing ceremony - the cultural evening of celebration.

Chancey from the American team (Church of the Resurrection) shows off during the Fashion Show.

Zambia during their cultural presentation

Me, Rachel, and Hannah with our new friend from Malawi, Sam

Reflections on Wounded Healers

The conference thus far had been absolutely amazing. Words cannot describe how great it has been to meet the delegates and satellite leaders, to share in our stories that have brought us to this place, to learn and worship and pray and feast and fellowship together in this conference center that has been made a holy place by so many great people gathered in one place.

Every night I go home and think about the days past, about how much I have been able to learn and grown in this short amount of time. I debrief a bit with my sisters I’m staying with (Hannah, Rachel, Lucy and Joyce) and think about what has been and what is yet to come. About how we are growing not as individuals but as a larger community across the continent of Africa. I think about what it means to be a “wounded healer” and am thankful that so very many people who have such deep, cutting wounds have sought healing in Christ and want to use those wounds to seek further healing or prevention of wounds for others.

I have heard stories that sound like they are from a book. These are the stories that I have heard “of” -
you know, the ones someone else once encountered and it affected them so strongly they brought it home to share, to share with others that others might seek a means to help and make a difference. These are the stories I have heard before, the stories that have helped connect me to these men, women and children. The stories that have played such a strong role in developing my understanding of my call to do what I can as one part of the body who has a means to make a difference. We were told many times this week, “As one person I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” That is the humble goal we seek this week. To make a positive change on person at a time. Easier said than done, as it is often harder to love one person well than to love the idea of changing a community. But that really is the point, isn’t it? That the higher path is rarely the easy one, and the right path requires a community such as Sister2Sister to rely on, encourage, and offer strength through prayer to one another. That is what this community has embraced. Those are the stories I am hearing.

Stories of lack of clean water in communities that are desperately trying to move on with education or development or farming, but who cannot because they must walk to carry dirty water home each day for cooking, cleaning, washing. Water that is making them sick, so the sick are taking turns with days off, meaning they really do need every person to help out.

Stories of communities where the average age is 14. Where entire generations have disappeared because of HIV/AIDS. In many households, it is difficult to be clear who is caring for who: the grannies for the babies, or the babies for the grannies. What would they do without each other? Where will this lead the next generation of youth?

Stories of women and children having violent crimes committed against them. Crimes of abuse, of violent rape, of being taken as child soldiers or sold into slavery. Crimes committed out of fear, confusion, miseducation. Crimes being committed because no one was there to break the cycle for them, because violence and abuse and fear are all some generations have ever known. Fear is the heart of so much of the evil and pain, and at times it seems unstoppable.

Then one comes to Sister2Sister Tujenge conference here in DRC, and we know differently here. Here, we are a room filled with people who carry these same stories, but something was different for them. For these women, children and a few men, these stories are as real today as they were the day the were a victim. The difference is that someone somewhere along the way reached out a hand to them - to one person - and offered them a way out of that cycle. Their worlds were changed. Now, these “Wounded Healers” want nothing more than to be that glimmer of hope and change for one other person. To return the favor as many times as they can. God has led us to this place, God has guided us through this healing, God has given us the courage and wisdom and presented us with opportunities to move beyond the cycles we were once in the midst of.

Here at Sister2Sister Conference, we are choosing God and God’s grace to continue moving us to a place of healing. We are focusing this week on the theme, the one thing that keeps us moving not from week to week or sometimes even day to day, but from moment to moment as we grow out of our own painful stories. We (Wounded Healers) are remembering that “Hope Is The Cornerstone of Africa.” Thanks be to God.

Arrival In Lubumbashi, DRC

(I write as we wait for our ride to the conference center this morning. A ride which is late, of course, but then we are working on African time!)

Our arrival in Congo was far from that which was expected, but it was a great arrival to say the least.

We were greeted with a large party of folks that I later learned were a mix of some locals and some satellite leaders from various places throughout Africa. As if we weren’t surprised to have such a large party waiting to greet us, perhaps an even bigger surprise was that we were greeted not as we got into the terminal, but as we got off of the airplane, still parked out off the runway! After a long day of travel, it was a great joy to have so many smiling, excited faces there to join us, and some familiar and some we looked forward to getting to know in the week to come.

As we walked toward the terminal in a large group, Mama Helene told us to follow her. We went off to the side rather than inside. She led us through some guards who simply nodded at her and allowed her to bring us through, and as we entered the first security gate, we were greeted with a series of photographs being taken and film being rolled as we were led into a VIP room with lots of big, soft couches. They collected passports and took care of the customs for us while we got to know each other a bit, also helping us to skip the hoopla of having to pay off the customs officers to get through. It was a great way to be received.

Upon leaving this private waiting room (which we later discovered we were able to be welcomed into because Mama Helene’s husband is a high official in the national government), our first introduction to the Congo was the roads. The road to the airport was a rare glimpse at a paved road in the country, but at times we weren’t sure if paved was better or not. We did decide that the term “pothole” was never quite sufficient, though, as these were definitely just holes. It was an adage to our adventure, and the more near we drew to the home where we’d be staying, the bumpier the roads (no longer paved) became. No worries, though - by the end of the week we hardly noticed when we were bouncing down a road with our heads knocking together. It was all just a part of the experience.

To New Beginnings

SO much... the year is off to a roaring start, for better and worse.

Costa Rica. An incredible trip, I was surprised and blessed by the make up of the group of the mission team Hyemin and I were invited to travel to and work in Costa Rica with. The average age of the group nearing 70, the stamina and incredibly hard work with such impressive results of this group blew me away. With any trip, this one brought with it highs and lows, and I am certainly a better person for this trip. I was unfortunately able to do very little (manual) labor/work while there, but the work I did in conversation (I picked up Spanish again much quicker than I anticipated, thankfully!) and in spending time with folks in the community were great. My first international mission trip (first trip with a mission team, that is), I learned a great deal about missions, etc. My favorite part? Witnessing the love, fellowship, friendships, and family that our group (specifically our trip leaders) shared with this community. They have been working together for 14 years, and their relationships are incredible gifts as a result of such efforts.

Promptly upon returning to forms of communication such as email and phone, I was alerted to a difficult and scary situation of my close friends, Ross and Amanda Baker. You may recall my great celebration in their first child just one month ago... and James Bennett is still doing great! Unfortunately, it is Mom who has been having some major troubles. It is public knowledge by now... and I could perhaps spend hours filling in details, but sparring them I say only that this family has been on a terrible rollercoaster. When James was only two weeks old, Amanda discovered a tumor that was initially believed to be cancer, and was later discovered to be a rare genetic disease known as Juvenile Polyposis... making this long story short, she has had major surgery and had her colon removed... all things considered she is doing very well! She was even released from the hospital on Friday, and will now be getting care from the comfort of "home" - they are residing back in Kansas with family.

I am so thankful she is doing well, and could not begin to articulate here how very difficult even this past week has been. I miss my dear friends so much, and while I am VERY thankful they are in Kansas surrounded by a great many friends and family who can support them, I miss them very much and wish there were more we could do for them from here. It sure is encouraging, though, to know that "literally thousands of people are praying" for them, as Ross pointed out. Incredible! (you're welcome to join in the prayers... they need them!). In the middle of all of this, James has turned one month old and the pictures prove he is healthy and rapidly growing!!

The spring semester has begun, and I am already deep into spring texts. There are many other things to update on in this crazy life I lead, but these must wait for another night. Tonight, I just needed to express my great thanksgiving for incredible people in my life. This weekend alone I was able to catch up with NINE friends I hold dear (including a surprise visit form Ross who was here to pick up somethings they left behind). I hope this is symbolic of the new semester to come, full of friends, fellowship, prayer and community. Without these things, I cannot imagine where I (we) would be.

A Step Back

I was a part of something last summer that was huge. It was something so much larger than myself that on days like today, something small triggers memories and how incredible that journey was sinks in a little more. It is something beyond articulation, beyond the pictures and slideshows and videos. It's even beyond the numbers or the thousands of dollars we raised.

I've seen this video a few times before, but when another rider posted it on Facebook tonight, I felt compelled to watch it again. Only this time, it left a pit in the bottom of my stomach. It left me thinking about how HUGE this was, about how this may have been the most incredible thing I have ever been a part of.

Tonight, that feels like a bigger statement than ever before. This week, I have been reminded countless times (both by my own reflections and by others) what a blessed life I lead, and how incredible it is that I have been able to do and be a part of so many different things. I absolutely love my life, and I know I am blessed to be living this life and feel called to live this life. A life of love and ministry and travel and full of opportunities to worship a God so big and so great that God makes all of the huge, incredible things of my life, seem so small...

As I sit tonight reading a book on Eschatology for a paper I need to write, I am simultaneously working on the many questions I need to answer for commissioning as an elder in The UMC (commissioning is the next step toward ordination). I am tossing around all of these things and making lists of everything I need to do... I am constantly thinking about my future and what it holds as my graduation is now only 4 months (128 days) away.

Something occured to me tonight that I have never even considered before (nor do I want to!): with every incredible and "unbeatable" experience I have so early in life, am I setting myself up for disappointments of slowing adventures in the future? Now, there are a lot of reasons I do not like that this came up. First - how devastating! But more importantly -that's nonsense! I have been able to be a part of incredible things, yes. BUT - no two have ever been alike, and each thing has brought with it incredible people and relationships that teach me new things and encourage me with new insight and passions! That, I am absolutely certain, will never change!

Besides that, I also think it is important to consider that my life will only ever be as adventurous as I allow it to be. If I wanted to stop seeking adventure, stop seeking a deeper, unique and more meaningful way to serve God, then I could. I could back down and take an "easier" path that I have no doubt my mother would prefer. But what fun is that when I know God has blessed me with the passion, energy, excitement and determination to always take the extra step!?

So I go. Sometimes, I go too much. Like now... when I've only been back in the US for 12 days, and I have only 12 days until I must be ready for my next adventure (a mission trip to Costa Rica). Sure, there are sacrifices I make to do these things. Like the fact that I'm even still up right now: there is not actually enough time to get everything done, so extensions and last-minute work have at times become the norm. (In good procrastinator style, my goal is to keep up on my work next semester - my LAST semester! - so the last few weeks are not so crazy... wish me luck!)

I suppose all of this is simply to say, "whoa!" It is good to step outside myself once in a while and reflect on this crazy life I lead. I hope I never settle for anything less than what feeds me in this way . and I cannot wait to see what is in store for my life next.

Incredible.